Best moments;
- Choi and Annie ironing my clothes:
After a month or so after arriving I had formed quite a close friendship with a couple of lovely girls: Annie and Choi. Im not sure what it was about me that drew them to me. Maybe it was my looks, possibly my charm, certainly my humor and definately my smell (but NOT my height). But regardless, we all became good friends almost immediately. The girls would come over to my house in the evening to drink on my "verandah", or hang out or whatever, and it was always a gay old time. One evening, when discussing what we should do, I suggested (probably with a few beers under my belt) that Choi and Annie could iron my shirts if they wanted. I reflexively brought my hands to cover my face, fearing a violent reprisal. To my astonishment, nothing was thrown at me, but rather a friendly "sure". Ironing is by far my most frustrating chore and would do anything to avoid it. So to have 2 beautiful women in my house, ironing my clothes, while I sat back in my chair, beer and celebratory cigar in hand, was not only my favourite moment of the year, but maybe my favorite moment of all time. I leaned back, and thought "It doesnt get any better than this".
-Being crowned fastest man in Jinju:
We all know I like to think im a hotshot when it comes to sport but ive never been confused with being the fastest person in any game or sport. Quick maybe, but not particularly fast. So I was filled with joy when I won all sprinting events at the beer Olympics. Maybe the alcohol aided my speed, im not sure, but I do know I kicked everyones arse, infront of everyone else, and that there were plenty of chicks watching. Since that night I have defeated all subsequent challenges from young upstarts trying to take down the top dog. All hail the champion!
Im so fast you can't even see me........- Winning Poker 4 times in a row:
I have a reputation for being a pretty horrendous poker player until the last couple of months when I reeled off back-to back-to back-to back wins. I don't think that this has ever been done before (In Jinju or even all of Asia) and certainly made me look like a competent player for a short time. It also almost covered me for all the times ive lost. ALMOST.
Worst moments; (and yes there are far more of these)
- Soju chugging contest:
Ill conceived idea at best. Was thinking I was buying a bottle to mix into drinks, but no, it was a straight chugging contest. I lost approximately 1.4 seconds into the contest when I began to vomit violently.
- Bus ride to the beach:
Ive covered this before but basically I caught a bus to the beach at 6 am in the morning, straight after a long night out. I thought id get to the beach, pass out, then wait until everyone met up with me. The perfect plan. However, I passed out before I got to the beach, and when I awoke I was in the same place as I left, 3 hours later. The bus driver neglected to wake me up at the beach, then turned around and came back to town. So much for my great plan. I got out of the bus, into the blinding light, half asleep/half dead, and into the path of some friends who gave me a look that said "Dude, sort your life out".
- Sleeping on the floor of the subway in Seoul:
Did this while waiting for the subway to begin after attending a concert. The dirty, slimy floor isnt the place you want to put your head after a day and night of drinking and dancing. Lucky it was for an hour and was on a piece of cardboard. Total bum style.
- Running in -2
I got sick of not being able to excercise in the middle of winter so one day I just said "screw it" and decided to put some hair on my chest and man up. It was a clear day, so it looked warm, but it most definately was not. Definatley goes down as the worst weather ive ever exercised in. I wore gloves, a long sleeve shirt and soccer socks and it wasnt nearly enough, and the warm water from the shower afterwards stung like crazy. There wasnt anything enjoyable about that 30 minutes.
- Arm Wrestling a girl
I learnt a very valuable lesson from this the hard way: Never, ever, ever, ever arm wrestle a girl. Even if she challenges you, create some excuse - im allergic to arm wrestling, the last time I did it my arm fell off, something, anything - or just do not accept. Her calling you a pussy without doing it is better than her calling you a pussy afterwords. You can't really gain anything from it; if you win, well, big deal, its a girl, you are supposed to win. Plus, if the girl likes you, she will hate you for not letting her win. If you loose then you are forever branded a complete loser. Its a no-win situation. So with all this in mind, I accepted a challenge from a female friend in a bar one night. Now, I maintain that she never actually won. I don't beleieve she ever fully wrestled my arm to the ground. Was it hovering 1-2 cms above the ground for about 5 minutes? Maybe. But she never won, and if she did, she was technically cheating. But this doesnt mean anything. Technically. Fully. Whatever. The fact that I didnt kick her arse, and was utterly dominated was all that was necessary for me to loose a whole lot of masculinty. Oh, and never let someone take photos of it either.....
- Tim Cahil crying in the soccer"
This just gave everyone something to point at whenever I tried to say how good Australia is, especially at sports. There is no comeback to "yea, well at least we dont cry when we loose".
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